Date: Thu, 8 May 1997 12:00:54 -0700
From: Patrick Douglas Crispen
Reply-To: TOURBUS-Request@LISTSERV.AOL.COM
To: TOURBUS@LISTSERV.AOL.COM
Subject: TOURBUS -- 8 MAY 1997 -- THE TOP5 LIST / THE TOP 5 WEB SITE / THE COMPENDIUM OF HTML ELEMENTS
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\___/ \___/ T h e I n t e r n e t T o u r B u s \___/
TODAY'S STOPS: THE TOP5 LIST / THE TOP 5 WEB SITE / THE COMPENDIUM
OF HTML ELEMENTS
TODAY'S ADDRESSES: top5-on@lists.zdnet.com
http://www.topfive.com
http://www.zdnet.com/wsources/topfive/top5.html
http://www.synapse.net/~woodall/html.htm
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of Internet happiness underway . . .
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Today's TOURBUS post can best be described as a "classic." In other words,
it is a rerun. Your fearless bus driver has been so busy studying for
finals and writing papers on such exciting topics as "Is 'digital money'
really money" that I haven't had the time to write a new post this week. I
was thinking of sending you my digital money paper, but I decided that I
didn't want to be that cruel (I have discovered that few people actually
care about, let alone take the time to read, monetary theory term papers).
:)
Anyway, today's first TOURBUS stop is at Chris White's "Top 5 List." TOP5
is a relatively clean humor list (the worst word I have seen on this humor
list recently is "ca-ca"). I must warn you, however, that the content on
TOP5 is VERY sarcastic and full of satire. If you are someone who is
easily offended by sarcasm and satire, I would strongly recommend that you
not visit today's TOURBUS stop. :)
With that said, let's pay a visit to the TOP5 list!
This is going to be a little difficult to explain, but bear with me. TOP5
is the distribution list for the "Top 5 list." The Top 5 list
is a little like David Letterman's Top Ten lists, only funnier. Each daily
Top 5 list has a topic (like "The Top 5 Rejected Breakfast Cereal Ideas")
and a list of funny responses to that topic (like "Beerios").
Actually, the name "Top 5 list" is a misnomer. It's called "The Top 5
List" because when Chris White first started the TOP5 list back in January
of 1994, it was hard for him to come up with more than 5 funny items for
each day's list. Now Chris gets at least 150 contributions each day that
are worthy of making that day's Top 5 list, so it is not unusual to see a
Top 5 list with 15 or 20 items on it. :)
To be a contributor to TOP5 is not easy. Potential Top 5 contributors are
forced to undergo a rigorous test to prove their comedic worth. There are
only 150 people who currently contribute to the TOP5 list, and all of their
contributions are edited by the TOP5 listowner, Chris White. Chris collates
and does some slight re-wordings of the submissions, throwing out
submissions that are in particularly bad taste (ones that are racist,
sexist, homophobic, etc.). Once Chris collates and edits the submissions,
he then sends out a new Top 5 list every day.
While becoming a contributor to TOP5 is pretty difficult, subscribing to
TOP5 so that you can receive each day's Top 5 list is simple! Before I
tell you how to subscribe, however, I want to give you a sneak peek at what
a typical Top 5 list looks like.
The following is taken from an old Top 5 list: "The Top 19 Rejected
Breakfast Cereal Ideas." My personal favorite is #7 :)
The Top 19 Rejected Breakfast Cereal Ideas."
19> Beerios
18> Kevorkian Krispies
17> Honeymoon Nuts
16> Chernobyl Charms
15> Eboli-O's
14> Cap'n Crack
13> Kellogg's Ganja Puffs
12> Lucky Tabs O' Acid
11> Colostomy Crunch
10> Phil Graham Crackers
9> Fruit & Fabio
8> Look Again -- Them Ain't Raisins!
7> Post-Modern Toasties and Rococo Puffs
6> Limbaugh Logs
5> Kellogg's "None of Your Goddam Business"
4> Special AK47
3> UnaBran
2> Nut 'N' Bitch
and the Number 1 Rejected Breakfast Cereal Idea...
1> CaCa Puffs
If you found this list as funny as I did, then you *have* to subscribe to
TOP5. To do that, just send an e-mail letter to
top5-on@lists.zdnet.com
That's it!
TOP5 IS ON THE WEB!
-------------------
According to the TOP5 FAQ, "[t]he Top Five List is a list created daily by
a scattered few comedy writers and wannabees scattered all across the
Internet. We pick a topic and come up with a list of applicable items.
The list is then posted to our web site, "topfive.com," and e-mailed out to
the members of our mailing list."
"TO OUR WEB SITE??" Yes, fellow bus riders, I am happy to announce that
TOP5 now has a Web site:
http://www.topfive.com/
Actually, the real address is
, but
is easier to remember and works just as well.
The TOP5 web site has a whole bunch of neat stuff, including:
1. Today's latest TOP 5 list,
2. An archive of *EVERY* TOP5 list ever sent out (if you are
looking for some of the funniest stuff on the Net, look no
further!),
3. A form that you can fill out to subscribe to the TOP5 e-mail
list, and
4. An online version of the "Hideously Unfair and Completely
Biased Top Five Contributor Test."
Even though the TOP5 listowner, Chris White, has has only accepted two of
my contributions to TOP5, TOP5 -- both the list and the Web site -- remains
one of my favorite online resources. :)
THE COMPENDIUM OF HTML ELEMENTS
-------------------------------
This next stop is for the techno dudes and dudettes on the Bus who code
their own Web pages by hand. If you ever get confused about what a
particular HTML tag does, or about how a particular tag should be used, you
really should check out Ron Woodall's compendium of HTML elements. The
compendium can be found in the States at
http://www.synapse.net/~woodall/html.htm
This page has links to both frames and noframes versions of the compendium
located in:
- Australia
- England
- Germany
- Israel
- Latvia, and
- North America
The compendium shows you how to use every tag from to , and it
also has links to Sandia's and W3's HTML resources.
Again, the compendium is kind of technical, but if you are confused about
some of the newer HTML tags, this may be just the thing that you have been
looking for!
TODAY'S STOPS: THE TOP5 LIST / THE TOP 5 WEB SITE / THE COMPENDIUM
OF HTML ELEMENTS
TODAY'S ADDRESSES: top5-on@lists.zdnet.com
http://www.topfive.com
http://www.zdnet.com/wsources/topfive/top5.html
http://www.synapse.net/~woodall/html.htm
--------------------------------
TODAY'S SOUTHERN WORD OF THE DAY
--------------------------------
MAUDLIN (verb). The act of displaying.
Usage: "She's right purty, she done maudlin for the Sears catalogue"
(Special thanks goes to Johnny Carwash for today's word)
YOU CAN FIND ALL OF THE OLD SOUTHERN WORDS OF THE DAY ON THE SOUTHERN WORD
HOMEPAGE AT http://ua1vm.ua.edu/~crispen/word.html
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.~~~. ))
(\__/) .' ) )) Patrick Douglas Crispen
/o o \/ .~ The University of Alabama
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/ , , ) \ http://ua1ix.ua.edu/~crispen/
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_( ( )_.' Warning: squirrels.
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